Chappelle’s Show – Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories – Rick James. Pt. 2 – Uncensored

Chappelle’s Show – Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories – Rick James. Pt. 2 – Uncensored


YOU KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING? BUT THEN, YOU KNOW,
HERE WE GO AGAIN. – COCAINE IS A HELL OF A DRUG. [chuckles] – RICK IS ENCOURAGING ME. YOU KNOW, HE SHOWS UP AT
MY BROTHER’S HOUSE FUCKED UP. – NICE PLACE, NIGGA. – SO HE HAD
THESE DIRTY COWBOY BOOTS ON. PUSHING US OUT OF THE WAY,
BARGED IN THE HOUSE. MY BROTHER HAD
THESE BRAND-NEW COUCHES. THEY WERE SUEDE, RIGHT? AND HE GETS ON THE COUCH
AND SAYS… – WHY DON’T I STRETCH OUT? [laughs] AND JUST STARTED GRINDING MUD
ALL INTO THE COUCH, MAN. – YEAH, I REMEMBER
GRINDING MY FEET INTO EDDIE’S COUCH. – YOU REMEMBER WHY YOU DID IT? – BECAUSE EDDIE
COULD BUY ANOTHER ONE. – FUCK YOUR COUCH, NIGGA. BUY ANOTHER ONE,
YOU RICH MOTHERFUCKER. FUCK YO’ COUCH, NIGGA! FUCK YO’ COUCH! DARKNESSES,
DARKNESSES… – ‘CAUSE OF MY COMPLEXION
HE USED TO CALL ME DARKNESS. HE CALLS ME
AND MY BROTHER DARKNESS. HE ALWAYS SAYS,
“DARKNESS BROTHERS.” SEE, THIS IS LONG BEFORE
WESLEY SNIPES. BACK THEN, WE WAS THE BLACKEST
NIGGAS ON THE PLANET ACCORDING TO RICK JAMES. – EDDIE–BOTH OF THEM WERE
BROTHER DARKNESS. TWIN BROTHER DARKNESS. – AND WE STANDING THERE,
LOOKING AT HIM, AND HE’S LOOKING RIGHT
IN OUR EYES AS HE GRINDS HIS MUD. – SEE, I NEVER JUST DID THINGS
JUST TO DO THEM. COME ON, I MEAN,
WHAT AM I GONNA DO? JUST, ALL OF A SUDDEN, JUST JUMP UP AND GRIND MY FEET
ON SOMEBODY’S COUCH LIKE IT’S, YOU KNOW,
SOMETHING TO DO? COME ON, I GOT A LITTLE
MORE SENSE THAN THAT. YEAH, I REMEMBER GRINDING
MY FEET ON EDDIE’S COUCH. [tape rewinding] SEE, I NEVER JUST DID THINGS
JUST TO DO THEM. COME ON, I MEAN,
WHAT AM I GONNA DO? JUST, ALL OF A SUDDEN, JUST JUMP UP AND GRIND MY FEET
ON SOMEBODY’S COUCH LIKE IT’S SOMETHING TO DO? COME ON, I GOT A LITTLE
MORE SENSE THAN THAT. YEAH, I REMEMBER GRINDING
MY FEET ON EDDIE’S COUCH. – BUT THEN IT WAS LIKE, “YOU KNOW WHAT?
LET’S HANDLE THIS.” WE WENT OVER THERE… – HEY, CHARLIE MURPHY! – AND WE HELD HIM DOWN, AND WE JUST WAILED ON HIS LEGS. – AAHHH! AAH, YOU DARKNESS… YOU BLACK, MIDNIGHT
EVIL MOTHERFUCKER! BLACK MAGIC, DARKNESS! YOU’RE ALL DARKNESS! YOU’RE FUCKIN’…
DELIRIOUS MOTHERFUCKER… AAH! YOU ARE COLD AS ICE. – BUT STILL, RICK JAMES, EVEN AFTER TAKING
A BEATING LIKE THAT… – FUCK YO’ COUCH, NIGGA. – THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S
GOIN’ OUT. HIS LEGS IS LIKE,
LIKE, LINGUINE. – I’VE BEEN KICKED OUT
OF BETTER HOMES THAN THIS! I’LL BE BACK,
YOU BLACK MOTHERFUCKERS! WIDE-NOSE-HAVIN’ MOTHERFUCKERS! THEY SHOULD’VE NEVER
GAVE YOU NIGGAS MONEY! YOU DON’T KNOW HOW
TO APPRECIATE SHIT! YOU KNOW YOU CAN
GET ANOTHER COUCH! WHAT AM I GONNA DO
ABOUT MY LEGS, EDDIE MURPHY! – MY BROTHER, YOU KNOW, HE’S A LOT MORE COMPASSIONATE
THAN I AM. HE’S LOOKING AND THE LIMO’S
DRIVIN’ OFF, AND HE SAID, “WOW, MAN,
RICK REALLY NEEDS HELP.” AND I WAS LIKE,
“YO, WE JUST GAVE HIM SOME HELP. “BUST HIS FUCKIN’ ASS AND SHIT. “I BET YOU
HE WON’T COME OVER HERE AND DISRESPECT
LIKE THAT AGAIN.” WRONG.
WRONG. WE’RE TALKIN’ ABOUT
RICK JAMES, MAN. – COCAINE’S A HELL OF A DRUG. [chuckles]